12.Sugar
On the Vermont Transit Bus I leaned my arm into a little chink
of sun
Going somewhere older than I was
Strapped into something tight, keeping me small
I dug into you like rock climbing
Too scared of coming down
Too scared of going up
Too scared of rockface
I should've split my sides or spilled my guts or hit you or
something
But I was good, and your father's little pancakes
So round and perfect and me sitting up too straight
Laughing in wrong places, kissing you
Kissing up, kissing too soon
When the cock crows
When the morning comes where will I go？
When the cock crows
When the love is gone where will I go？
And when you got me pregnant I stopped the party and
I stopped the typewriter and I stopped your dumb ball game in
the red barn and I
Stopped your father and bled instead
And I felt the lie - something sticky on the inside
A bitter wind in my throat
Stopping me wanting
In my stomach, in my head and you said
Sugar sugar, you couldn't come come
Sugar sugar, without your mother
Sugar sugar, you couldn't taste it
Sugar sugar, in my throat
When the cock crows
When the morning comes where will I go？
When the cock crows
When the love is gone where will I go？
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